Carl Guderian on Thu, 25 Sep 2003 14:11:48 +0200 (CEST) |
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Re: <nettime> Threat Matrix: Early Snapshot of the Propaganda War |
Cutting edge chutzpah! This one jumped the shark while coming out of the starting gate. It's even been vaccinated against accusations of racism, by having a couple of Arab-Americans on the good guys's side. I'm waiting for the secret plot by Old Europeans, assisted by our old friends the Bilderbergers and the Gnomes of Zurich, to drive down the dollar in favor of the Euro. "Soon America will fall into our hands like an overripe fruit! Everybody will be forced to drive little girly cars and pay $0.50 to use public bathroom. Muhuhahaha! On the other hand, you Americans can smoke again!" Early returns show they managed to make nuclear terror and freelance biowarfare boring. HSA agents teleporting around the globe like Sydney Bristow in "Alias" is the least of its improbabilities. Like "Cain's Hundred," it'll be lucky to bag a dozen baddies before the axe falls. Too boring even to download for a cheap laugh. Threat Matrix defeats Ebola but succumbs to "Friends" and "Survivor": http://www.suntimes.com/output/rosenthal/cst-ftr-phil18.html Most newspapers say it's crap. As does disinformation: http://www.disinfo.com/site/displayarticle602.html Here's a funny review I lifted from http://www.numskullery.com/: THREAT MATRIX: RELOADED Well, I tried to watch Threat Matrix, but sadly I didn't make it through 30 minutes of the thing. It's just lame. For a bunch of "national security experts" they sure do spend a lot of time explaining all the gear and procedures to each other. People, people, they are better ways to explain stuff to the audience. This show could really take some pointers from Alias, CSI, Law & Order, and 24. Threat Matrix handles threats to national security with all the urgency of swinging in a hammock while drinking a beer. These guys looked downright bored sometimes. Ugh. After watching just 30 minutes of this lame-ass yawnfest, I have to consider the TV Guide my own personal Threat Matrix brief. But here's something I bet you didn't know: The terror alert advisory is actually based on the General Mill's cereal Trix. Whichever piece is left in the President's cereal bowl after breakfast is what color the threat advisory is for the day. Posted by chris at 09:50 PM | Comments (4) ments (4) For a non-PC equivalent, rent "Wanted: Dead Or Alive," the mid-80s movie with Rutgar Hauer as bounty hunter Josh Randall III. The Arab villain Malik Shah is played by the non-Arab Gene Simmons, former lead singer of '70s mega-rock group KISS, and he plans to gas Los Angeles, Bhopal-style, infiltrating the chemical plant like Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves. The plan is foiled, pretty much like it was for the Forty Thieves. Carl I spell *my* name DANGER -- Games are very educational. Scrabble teaches us vocabulary, Monopoly teaches us cash-flow management, and D&D teaches us to loot the bodies. -- Steve Jackson # distributed via <nettime>: no commercial use without permission # <nettime> is a moderated mailing list for net criticism, # collaborative text filtering and cultural politics of the nets # more info: [email protected] and "info nettime-l" in the msg body # archive: http://www.nettime.org contact: [email protected]